SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

November 26, 2013

Dear Abby: Meeting ‘good guy’ online requires serious search

Dear Abby: May I address a question you printed on July 24? “Where Are the Good Guys?” has trouble meeting men and wrote about seeking sexual partners on Craigslist. You answered that there were no good men there.

Well, I met my boyfriend of two years through a “no strings attached” ad I posted on Craigslist. It turns out we had a strong attraction and chemistry, and he’s one of my best friends. So what if we were adults who wanted a casual relationship to start with? Don’t judge everyone that way.

The reason that woman is having problems is she’s using the site to find sex partners when she really wants more. She needs to look in the “relationship” section or on a relationship site. Don’t blame men for wanting to have sex when that’s what she’s advertising. They aren’t all “bad.” They are actually more truthful than she is.

Happily Coupled In Omaha

Dear Happily Coupled: I heard from many readers who described successful relationships that started online. I did not mean to imply that there are no good men on Craigslist. My concern was the writer was looking for a meaningful, lasting relationship in a category where people look for casual sex. Others identified with “W.A.T.G.G.’s” problem and were quick to offer their views:

Dear Abby: I’m a female, 59, and like the woman in that letter, also not considered beautiful. But I do have two very good men friends in my life, and I met them both online.

There ARE men of quality out there. You just have to be careful and read between the lines. Abby, online personals are the new “bar scene.”

Donna In Missouri

Dear Abby: While I agree with you that she should talk to a psychologist about her low self-esteem, it IS possible to find a true partner online IF you are dedicated and serious. I subscribed to a dating service 31/2 years ago and met a wonderful woman on the site. We are married now and expecting our first baby.

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