SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

March 18, 2013

Dear Abby: Wedding for bride on rebound should be small and subdued

(Continued)

They may be clingy because they are worried about what will happen to THEM if something happens to YOU.

:Dear Abby: My husband of eight years had an affair with an old girlfriend who is also married. I have spent the last nine months trying to forgive him, but he keeps breaking my heart because he can’t seem to get over her.

First, he was sending her emails, then trying to call her because he felt so guilty over the affair and “needed someone to talk to.” Next, he went over to her house to see her. I know he loves me, but I know without a doubt he loves her, too. I’m expecting and due in the short term, and I don’t know how to heal.

The last time they talked — about a month ago — he told her she had ruined his life and he never wanted to see or think about her again. But I know he still searches her profile on Facebook every day and I know she blocked him, so he must be going nuts because he can’t see her and her kids’ pictures. I haven’t confronted him about this yet, but feel I need to. Please help me.

:Brokenhearted in Buffalo

:Dear Brokenhearted: The old girlfriend seems to be doing her part to end the affair. Whether your husband is “going nuts” because he can’t see her on Facebook is HIS problem, so please don’t make it yours.

Bide your time, have your baby, and then when you’re strong enough, DO confront him. Insist on marriage counseling for both of you.

You need to understand why he strayed before you or the marriage can heal.

---

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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