SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

March 19, 2013

Dear Abby: Sisters trying to get pregnant may share the same problem

:Dear Abby: I’m in my early 20s, happily married and financially secure. My husband and I have been discussing having children. My problem is my sister has been trying to start a family for three years, to no avail because she has infertility issues.

These issues run in our family, and there is a 75 percent chance that I will have the same problem. Should I talk to my sister about my trying to get pregnant, or wait until I’m pregnant and break the news to her then? Since I may have the same problem she’s having, I don’t want to discuss something with her that may never happen. Any thoughts?

:Don’t Want to Hurt Her

:Dear Don’t Want to Hurt Her: “Springing” news that you are pregnant would be more of a jolt to her than hearing that you’re trying. I see no reason to keep this a secret from your sister. Because problems conceiving run in your family, talking about it might be helpful to both of you. If you do become pregnant, she may want to consult your doctor. If it doesn’t happen, the two of you can emotionally support each other.

:Dear Abby: After 20 years of marriage, I am now again in the dating world — and wow, have things ever changed! What happened to the days when men would open doors, kiss your cheek, or try to impress you by sending flowers, complimenting you and chasing you to go out with them? Nowadays, the guys expect me to impress them, call them first, etc.

What are your thoughts on this? I have been on numerous dates, and out of all of them, only one man acted like an old-school gentleman. Unfortunately, he was only 30. I’m in my mid-40s.

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