SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

March 10, 2014

Dear Abby: High blood pressure can damage kidneys

(Continued)

Readers, March is National Kidney Month, and March 13 is World Kidney Day. If you are at risk, schedule an appointment with your doctor. For anyone who needs more information, the National Kidney Foundation’s website is kidney.org.

Dear Abby: I’m a member of the clergy who enjoys studying for my ministry and doctoral work at a local coffee shop. Three men who go there every day have found out that I’m a minister, and they each want to talk with me while I’m there. Although all three are members of the same religion, none of them is affiliated with a church.

I have invited them to visit my worship services, as well as call the office and set up an appointment with me. I have also tried to diplomatically explain that I go to the coffee shop to study. One of them ignores it, another appears hurt and the third one gets offended. When they’re not around, I am productive. When they show up, they want me to be their chaplain.

Because of where I live, finding another coffee shop is not a viable option. How can I set a boundary with them and still do my studying there? Thank you.

Reverend Ken In New York

Dear Reverend: Do it the same way doctors or lawyers do with people who approach them for “free” advice outside the office. As soon as you are approached, say firmly, “I’m studying right now. If you want to talk, please call my office and I’ll schedule an appointment with you. Right now I’m busy.” And then refuse to be intimidated by their reaction. Unless you draw the line, they’ll suck you dry.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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