Dear Readers: It’s April Fools’ Day, the one day I can share some of the more unique letters that come my way — clearly, more than a few of which were written in an attempt to have some fun with me. Enjoy!
Dear Abby: Many times, when I would wake up in the morning, I’d find toothpaste already on my toothbrush, courtesy of my foreign-born girlfriend, “Inger.” Because I am chivalrous, I figured I would return the favor. So, at night before going to bed or in the morning, I’d tiptoe to the bathroom and put toothpaste on her toothbrush.
Well, the other day Inger told me, “DON’T put toothpaste on my toothbrush!” I was flabbergasted. And if that’s not enough, she no longer preps my toothbrush, either.
I know, I know — I should have asked a simple “Why?” but I wasn’t in the mood for drama. Now it’s eating at me, and I just don’t get it.
Confused In Connecticut
Dear Confused: I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but here it is: Inger appears to be giving you the brush-off.
Dear Abby: I have this really hot, sexy latex dress in lilac. I can’t decide which color 6-inch stilettos to wear with it, black or white. I don’t want to look trashy.
Fashionista In The East
Dear Fashionista: With latex in April, wear flats and a LONG overcoat.
Dear Abby: I married a wonderful man last week. It was the wedding of my dreams except for one thing: My husband’s sister brought six birds with her and insisted it was perfectly acceptable to keep them in the reception area. My new in-laws all said I was “unreasonable” for not allowing the caged birds in the reception area.