:Dear Abby: I have been dating “Wayne” for about a year. Everything is wonderful, but my problem is he is stingy when it comes to issuing a compliment. I’ll get dressed up — makeup, hair, the whole thing — and ask him what he thinks, and his response is always, “It’s OK. You always look beautiful to me, so you don’t have to dress up.”
Maybe I shouldn’t complain about this, but sometimes I feel Wayne would say I looked good if I were sick and vomiting into a toilet. It’s not like I want him to say I look awful; I just want more of a response than what I’m getting. Any ideas on how to approach this?
:Always Beautiful? In Minnesota
Dear Always Beautiful: Yes. Approach your boyfriend directly. Tell him there is something you need from him that you’re not getting — and that is acknowledgment when you make a special effort. Explain that while you’re complimented that he thinks you’re always beautiful, you feel let down by his reaction. If he cares about your feelings, he may be a little more generous.
Dear Abby: How and when do I tell the guy I just started seeing that I have bipolar disorder? I don’t want to make him think I’m crazy. On the other hand, I really like him and hope our relationship will grow into something more. I don’t want to start it off with a lie.
:Not Really Crazy In Massachusetts
:Dear Not Really Crazy: You shouldn’t start off a relationship with a lie. However, health information of any sort is personal, and it need not be revealed until you become friendly enough that there is a reason to know. Once you become good friends, you should disclose any information that is pertinent, including your diagnosis and the fact that it is being managed.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.