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Lifestyle

June 18, 2013

Dear Abby: Jew striving for orthodox life wants fiance to support her

:Dear Abby: I have been with my fiance for four years. He is 32, I’m 23. He is Catholic, and I am Jewish. When I met him, I wasn’t particularly religious, but since planning a trip to Israel and after studying under a rabbi, I have become more religious.

I now keep kosher and try to be as close to Orthodox as I can. I eventually want an Orthodox Jewish home and for my children to be raised Jewish. But every time I try to discuss this with him, he nods his head and says in a sarcastic tone, “Uh-huh.”

I don’t think he understands how serious I am about becoming Orthodox, even though I live the lifestyle now. How can I ensure that he will live and raise our children in an Orthodox Jewish way before I walk down the aisle and it is too late?

:Keeping Kosher In New York

:Dear Keeping Kosher: Your fiance is behaving as if he thinks you are going through a phase rather than making an actual commitment to becoming Orthodox Jewish. If he had any interest in raising his children in the Jewish faith, he would have shown it by asking questions and trying to learn more about what that would entail.

I won’t mince words with you: The only guarantee I can offer that your children will be raised Orthodox Jewish would be for you to marry a man who feels similarly.

:

Dear Abby: My wife is the best thing that ever happened to me. After 34 years together — 28 of them married — she is still the love of my life. How can I express this to her?

I have done the usual things over the years: candy, flowers, presents. I give cards, but I am not a wordsmith. I love her so much I don’t know if it is even possible to express it with words or gifts, but still I try.

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