SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

November 10, 2012

Dear Abby: Daughter and boyfriend are slow to embrace their future

:Dear Abby: My daughter, “Renee,” is 25 and is an intelligent and independent woman with a good job. She has been in a relationship with her boyfriend, “Bryan,” for 61/2 years. They have been living together for the past two years.

Bryan is nice and has a decent job, and I like him. However, there is virtually no conversation between them about what their future together holds. Renee would like to get engaged, but she refuses to bring anything up to Bryan for fear that he will feel “pushed.” She wants it to happen with no prodding. I maintain that it’s perfectly acceptable to ask where he sees their relationship going.

At this point, I’d like to take Bryan aside and say that I love my daughter and would like to know what his intentions are. Is that totally inappropriate in this day and age? I worry she may be throwing away her best years on a dead-end relationship.

I know Renee would not be happy if I approached Bryan with this. Should I just keep my mouth shut and let her handle it?

Mama on a Mission

Dear Mama: You are well-meaning, but this is one mission your daughter must complete for herself. Please tell her that after a relationship of six years and living together for two of them, having a rational discussion with Bryan would not be “pushy.” In fact, it’s the intelligent thing to do. He may have commitment issues. Or he may need the “nudge.” And frankly, if the romance is leading nowhere, Renee needs to know that an engagement to him is not in her future before she invests any more time.

Dear Abby: My niece is engaged to a really nice guy who is obviously gay and in denial because of his religion. My brother and his wife ignore it because, according to them, being gay is a “sin.” This couple have been out of high school for two years. They are also both virgins, which is unusual.

Text Only | Photo Reprints
Lifestyle
  • Monday's Best Bets Best Bets for Monday, July 28

    Looking for something to do today? Check out The Salem News' Best Bets.

    July 28, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dear Abby: Son-in-law’s abusive father makes gatherings painful Dear Abby: I adore my son-in-law, "Tom." He's a wonderful husband to our daughter. He's always inviting us to dinner along with his parents and family. We get along with them but can't stand how they treat Tom. We have never seen parents treat their

    July 28, 2014

  • This weekend's Best Bets Best Bets for Saturday, July 26

    Looking for something to do today? Check out The Salem News' Best Bets:

    July 26, 2014 1 Photo

  • North Shore religion news in brief Congregation Shirat Hayam is offering a free, five-week Hebrew Reading Crash Course on Tuesdays at 7:30 p.m. from Sept. 2 through Oct. 7, at the synagogue, 55 Atlantic Ave., Swampscott. Led by Nancy Miller, the course is open to the community and is

    July 26, 2014

  • North Shore religion calendar Wednesday, July 30 Book Club, 7 p.m., Aviv Centers for Living, 240 Lynnfield St., Peabody. Women of all ages are invited to a free book group with conversations about Jewish identity. Group will discuss "The Harem Midwife" by Roberta Rich. RSVP to Sh

    July 26, 2014

  • Dear Abby: Teen is looking for direction after high school graduation Dear Abby: I am an 18-year-old high school senior who is scared about what's going to happen after graduation. For the past three years I have known exactly where I'll be and what I will be doing in the general sense. Now that I have one more year to

    July 26, 2014

  • macaws Vet Connection: Pet birds need training, social interaction and time out of the cage People are fascinated with the big colorful birds on display at Animal Kingdom and wild bird sanctuaries. It's always fascinating to see someone walking down the street with a big-beaked bird on his or her shoulder as a companion. We are all drawn to

    July 25, 2014 1 Photo

  • Ask Dog Lady: Her little dog is obsessed with food Dear Dog Lady: I have a 3-year-old, long-coated Chihuahua named Mexipep (after a brand of hot sauce). She has many fine attributes -- she's very sweet, not nervous and barky like the short-coated Chihuahuas can be. On the subject of food, however, th

    July 25, 2014

  • howe Book Notes: Local novelist sees ‘conversion’ syndrome in witch trials The parallels between 1692 and today are so close, they're frightening. That's one conclusion you could draw from reading "Conversion," Marblehead resident Katherine Howe's new novel, which compares the world of the Salem Witch Trials to the life of

    July 25, 2014 1 Photo

  • vehicles Quick pick: Festival of vehicles

    Festival of vehicles Take a ride over to the Hamilton-Wenham Public Library for the 16th annual Vehicle Night on Wednesday from 5:30 to 7:30 p.m. The festival of fire trucks, emergency vehicles, cruisers and snow plows takes place in the library park

    July 25, 2014 1 Photo

NDN Video
Comments Tracker