SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

December 22, 2012

Dear Abby: Time to drive home a point in long-distance relationship

:Dear Abby: My boyfriend and I are in a long-distance relationship and agreed to split our visits 50-50 between our cities. Initially, it worked great. Unfortunately, his work schedule has changed, and for the past year he has come here to visit me only once every month or so, while I frequently drive for hours to see him.

He says that because he’s away from home for work, it’s only fair that I travel to see him since it’s “less trouble” for me. I understand that he puts in a lot of time with travel for work, but at what point does the ratio become unbalanced and unfair?

I miss weekends in my city with my friends, and it makes me sad that he won’t make the effort to see me. What do you think is right in this matter?

Uncertain In San Francisco

Dear Uncertain: “What’s right” is the original agreement you had with your boyfriend, or something close to it. Because he is no longer willing to live up to his part in the bargain, consider seeing him less often.

Perhaps if he has a chance to miss you, he will feel impelled to make more of an effort. And if he’s not, then you won’t have to cut off your social relationships at home — relationships you may need if this romance doesn’t work out the way you would like.

Dear Abby: My wife of 32 years has delusional jealousy. It is so bad that she has checked my genitals and questioned the neighbors’ wives. I have stayed in this marriage only because of our children, who are now adults.

I am at a crisis point where I want a divorce. I detest throwing 32 years away, but I have no love for this woman. We have sought counseling three times. However, once I start describing her delusions, the sessions quickly stop.

Text Only | Photo Reprints
Lifestyle
  • Jenson1 Salsa spirit Dance party will benefit Jazz & Soul Festival Salsa spirit

    April 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • rhinaespaillat Survival through art Rhina Espaillat met many survivors of the Holocaust when she was growing up in New York and was often impressed by their strength of mind. "I was always surprised to meet people who came through the Holocaust not only physically whole, but mentally w

    April 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • 140422_SN_HAND_READERSEYE The reader's eye Name: Sarah Rydgren Hometown: Salem Description: Taken during a ride through the Kancamagus Highway in New Hampshire last week. I love the mountains, and this stretch of highway is one of my favorite roads to travel. I am a self-taught photographer a

    April 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • shellfish North Shore Entertainment Calendar

    Good causes LIBRARY FUNDRAISER AND STORY PROGRAM. Thursday, April 24, 1 to 4 p.m., Swizzles Frozen Yogurt, 421 Paradise Road, Vinnin Square, Swampscott. Swampscott Public Library fundraiser features a free story and music program for children of all

    April 24, 2014 4 Photos

  • benefitrace Good cause Racing for a reason On Sunday, Salem State University hosts its 18th annual North Shore Fitness 5K Road Race and Fun Walk, starting at 9 a.m. at the O'Keefe Sports Complex, 225 Canal St., Salem. Advance registration is $18 for Gassett Fitness members

    April 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dear Abby: Parents appalled by man’s indifference to son Dear Abby: My 23-year-old son, "Wayne," who is single, has a 3-year-old son. We didn't learn about the child until he was more than a year old, when Wayne was asked to take a paternity test. Luckily, we have been able to form a good relationship wit

    April 24, 2014

  • Thursday's Best Bets Best Bets for Thursday, April 24

    Looking for something to do today? Here are The Salem News' Best Bets:

    April 24, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dear Abby: Married couple’s sex life is all about the numbers Dear Abby: I have been married to a wonderful man for 30 years. Our marriage may not be perfect, but it's quite good. My dilemma is this: My husband keeps track of every time we have sex and has a personal goal of 100 times a year. In 2013, he infor

    April 23, 2014

  • Wednesday's Best Bets Best Bets for Wednesday, April 23

    Looking for something to do today? Here are The Salem News' Best Bets:

    April 23, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dear Abby: Don't meddle in office affair unless it interferes with work

    Dear Abby: I manage a group of 15 employees. A few months ago, I hired the wife of an old friend. Until now she has been a great employee, but recently, she and a male co-worker have been taking lunches and breaks together in a way that leads me to b

    April 22, 2014

NDN Video
Comments Tracker