:Mike in Missouri
:Dear Mike: As women age, their hormone levels decrease, which can cause the sex drive to diminish. The reduced hormone levels can also make sex painful. If your wife would discuss these changes with her gynecologist or an endocrinologist, there may be a solution that would put some spark back in your marriage. However, that won’t happen unless you are able to speak frankly with her about what’s bothering you.
:Dear Abby: I have been studying my whole life to become a classical singer. Many people have put great effort into helping me to succeed, especially my mother, who wanted to be an opera singer when she was my age. She is not a pushy stage mother, though. I chose to pursue music myself.
However, I have recently realized my heart is not fully in it and that I’d rather go to law school. I’m afraid to tell my mother and the other people about my decision because they have invested so much in me as a performer. I don’t want to disappoint them, but my passion is now constitutional law. How do I share the news without breaking my mother’s heart?
:Singing a Different Tune
:Dear Singing: Your mother may be disappointed, but her heart will heal. If your passion is not in opera singing, the truth is you won’t go very far in the field. (Even people who are passionate about it don’t always succeed.) Wanting to be a lawyer is nothing to be ashamed of. Follow your dream.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.