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Lifestyle

September 21, 2013

Dear Abby: Husband’s nonstop nature wears on wife’s patience

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Dear Abby: I reconnected with my dad two years ago. I hadn’t spoken with him for almost 10 years, following my parents’ divorce. I’m thankful he’s back in my life again.

The problem is his wife, “Kathy.” Ever since we reunited, I have felt she resented me. It’s like she doesn’t like sharing Dad with me. She had him all to herself for 10 years, so I guess I kind of understand.

Kathy recently found a job across the country, so she and Dad sold their house and moved away a few weeks ago. Her family lives here and she had job offers closer to home, but she chose the one farthest away. I can’t help but feel she did it to put distance between Dad and me, and it hurts me deeply. How do I talk to my dad about it without damaging the relationship?

:Loving Daughter In Wisconsin

:Dear Loving Daughter: What do you think talking about it to your father will accomplish? You don’t know for certain that she accepted the job to separate you and your dad. Remember, he AGREED to the move.

The problem with family estrangements is that you can never get back the time you lost. Keep in touch with your father via cards and letters, texts and emails, video chats or other social media — whatever you and your father are most comfortable with. But I do NOT advise saying anything negative about Kathy.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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