Dear Abby: I have been dating Mr. Right for two years. “Phil” is the man I want to spend my life with. When we are together privately, everything is perfect.
The problem is, Phil hangs out with his old college buddies every few weeks or months, and it often involves his ex-girlfriends. They don’t hang out alone. There is always at least one other person there. The situations usually include drinking, which worries me.
In my opinion, Phil should not be seeing his exes, even though his college friends are still buddies with them. Phil doesn’t understand why I think this is so wrong. I am uncomfortable and think he should avoid these situations.
Am I overly jealous, or should I call it quits because he won’t respect my feelings on the matter?
Home Alone In Kokomo
Dear Home Alone: I don’t think you are overly jealous, but I do think you may be overly insecure. Has Phil given you any reason to think he has cheated on you? If not, you should trust that he is doing nothing more than hanging out occasionally with old friends.
You say he is encountering exes (plural) when he sees his male friends. If it was just one, you might have cause to worry. Remember, these women are exes for a reason. Unless you want to be another ex, you should lighten up because insecurity and possessiveness are unattractive traits.
Dear Abby: We have lived next door to a couple, “Evie” and “Earl,” for five years. I thought we were good friends. Over the years, I vented to Evie about my relationship with my daughter-in-law, “Cate.” I watch my two grandkids most of the week and have complained to her about Cate’s poor parenting skills.