SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

February 1, 2013

Dear Abby: Romantic’s heart is bruised by end of long relationship

:Dear Abby: A great man once said, “A life without love is no life at all.” So many people find love in so many ways, either through arranged marriages or at social events, school or college.

I have always been a hopeless romantic, but since the end of my eight-year relationship, my heart no longer feels the same. I feel as though love will never find me.

I know people say when it happens you will know, but my question is: How do you really KNOW? And when that time does ever come, how do you prepare your heart for love after a tragic loss?

Trying to Go On

Dear Trying: I’m sorry for your loss and heartache. But unless your lover was wrenched from you by death, you should do what people of both sexes must when a romance ends — ask yourself why and what you have learned from it.

The failure of a romance doesn’t mean that love will never happen again. You will know you have found love when you meet someone who makes you feel strong instead of dependent, who appreciates you for the person you are and isn’t threatened by your successes, who supports you when you’re down, takes pride in your accomplishments, and will hug you even after a difficult day. And it shouldn’t take “preparation,” just a willingness to risk putting yourself out there and a little good luck.

Dear Abby: My husband and I live more than 1,000 miles away from our family. When our relatives fly out to visit us, should we feel obligated to let them use one of our cars to travel/tour while they are here? (Money is not an issue.) In most cases, they may be on the other side of the state for several days, leaving my husband and me to share a car. It is an inconvenience because my husband and I leave for work at different times.

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