SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

December 17, 2012

Man buying his own gifts is selling wife short

:Dear Abby: Twice in recent years my husband has bought a gift for himself for Christmas, wrapped it, put it under the tree and then opened it on Christmas morning, gleefully exclaiming that it was a great gift and just what he wanted.

The first time he did it, he wrote my name on the gift card as the giver.

The second time he didn’t bother. When I asked him why, he said it was something he saw in the store and wanted. When I asked why he didn’t just ask me to get it, he didn’t have an answer.

He has also bought cards for himself for Valentine’s Day. On both of them he wrote, “To Larry from ‘Hon,’” his pet name for me.

I was flabbergasted and upset and asked him why he would do such a thing. He said he ran across the “perfect card” for him while looking for one for me.

I don’t know what to make of his behavior, but it is demeaning and I feel angry for days afterward. He has a habit of comparing my gifts with those from his son or those he bought for himself, and it makes me feel as if mine don’t measure up.

My husband is 77. What’s wrong with him?

Perplexed in Florida

Dear Perplexed: It appears you married someone who likes to buy on impulse and is insensitive to how his words and actions affect others. Look on the bright side: He’s solved the problem of what to get the man who has everything for you!

However, because this is a recent change in his behavior, consider reporting it to his doctor.

Dear Abby: I have received several invitations to parties recently in which I was asked to do part of the work or participate in some of the expenses.

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