SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

April 3, 2013

Dear Abby: Woman’s big breasts are no big deal to boyfriend

:Dear Abby: Before we met, my girlfriend got large breast implants. I think they’re a terrible turnoff, but I don’t know how to tell her. Should I try to overlook this because I love her, or can I tell her the truth about why our love life is sometimes not so hot? I have known her long enough that the next step is marriage — or nothing.

She walks around the house bare-chested and obviously thinks I find her breasts a big turn-on. I have faked it for five years. What should I do?

:Not That Excited in Colorado

:Dear Not That Excited: Your letter is a lesson about the danger of “faking it.” Level with your girlfriend, but without using the words “terrible” and “turnoff.” Tell her you love her, but while many men find large breasts to be a turn-on, you actually prefer smaller ones — to the degree that it sometimes affects your sexual performance.

Explain that if she thinks her breasts are what have kept you interested, it’s not the case. At some point, one or more of her implants may need to be replaced, and she might opt for smaller ones.

:Dear Abby: I moved to Australia 10 years ago. It has been a fantastic adventure, but I feel drawn home. Complicating things is the fact that I have a same-sex Australian partner. Because gay marriage is not federally recognized in the United States, he has no possibility of legally emigrating there. His skills are not sufficient.

To move back to the U.S. would destroy my home, which is a happy one. On the other hand, I come from a large, close family, and my parents are entering their 70s. I miss my family and my culture every day, and feel torn between my family in the U.S. and my partner in Australia.

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