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Lifestyle

June 15, 2013

Dear Abby: Daughter living with boyfriend doesn’t get mother’s support

:Dear Abby: I am 25, and my boyfriend and I have been together since high school. We have now decided to take our relationship to the next level by living together.

When I brought up the idea to my mother a few months ago, she was against it. She said if I do this it will change my relationship with her. My boyfriend and I are college graduates, have good jobs and are self-supporting. If things work out between us, we will most likely be getting married next year.

I am an only child and I don’t want to hurt my mother or have our relationship change, but I want to be able to live my own life. I would like her support, but don’t know how to tell her what we have decided or if it would be worth breaking the special bond between my mother and me.

:Only Child In California

:Dear Only Child: Stop beating around the bush and tell your mother what your plans are. At 25, you are old enough — and this relationship has gone on long enough — that moving in together is a natural progression toward a permanent commitment. Her resistance is based on fear of what your independence from her will mean — to her.

However, if you truly can’t decide whether cutting the umbilical cord is worth it, then keep things as they are — and remain her little girl forever.

:

Dear Abby: I am a teenager who has liked this guy for a long time. We’ve been best friends forever, and I have liked him for two years. Recently he asked me out, and I was ecstatic — at first. I still like him, but every time I think about him or I’m around him, or anything about him comes up, I get this horrible nausea. I have actually vomited because of it. How can I like him but he makes me feel ill? Is there a way to remedy this?

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