SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

May 19, 2014

Dear Abby: Husband thinks less is more when wife budgets for clothes

Dear Abby: I have been working hard to advance in my health care career so I can give my family a decent life. I have worked my way up from poverty, paying my own way, earning my degree through the military and sheer determination.

I have reached a point where I would like to enjoy life a little more, but my husband thinks I am being “materialistic.” We fight often over my wardrobe spending.

I believe the clothes I wear, mostly nice skirt suits and heels, are part of my job and image. I believe it has helped me to get ahead. I don’t buy overly expensive items, but they aren’t cheap. I wear the things I buy for years and have a $200-a-month budget for what I may need, even though I don’t always spend it.

I think I have earned the right to shop a little, which will ultimately lead to bigger and better things for my family, so why does my husband make me feel so guilty?

Clothes Make The Woman

Dear C.M.T.W.: Not knowing your husband, it’s difficult to say, but I’ll throw out a few ideas.

Could he be insecure or intimidated by your professional image? Could he be jealous on some level? In what kind of environment was he raised? Was his mother’s “uniform” a housedress?

If you are earning good money and your family is being provided for, then you are certainly entitled to spend some of it on yourself. And you shouldn’t have to apologize for it.

Dear Abby:Text ColorSwatch/NoneStrokeStyle/$ID/SolidText ColorSwatch/NoneStrokeStyle/$ID/SolidText ColorText ColorText ColorText Color I am getting married in October, and my fiance, “Brad,” and I are having trouble seeing eye-to-eye on the name-change issue.

Text Only | Photo Reprints
Lifestyle
  • Dear Abby: Husband who relives past should focus on present Dear Abby: I'm married to the love of my life. I can't imagine loving a man more than I love "Wayne," and I know he feels the same about me. The problem is, he's always telling stories about things he has done, including past relationships, in graphi

    August 20, 2014

  • Dear Abby: Young man with heart scar has options for covering it up Dear Abby: You printed a letter from "Self-Conscious in Georgia" (May 15), a young man who is insecure about the scar from his heart surgery. I have had three surgeries for congenital defects, my first at 2 years old. Because many women's fashions ex

    August 19, 2014

  • Dear Abby: Angry wife resents husband for hiding news of his health Dear Abby: When my husband is sick or needs to have surgery, he refuses to tell his family and doesn't want me to. This puts me in a very awkward position. I'm damned if I do tell them because he will be upset with me, and damned if I don't because h

    August 18, 2014

  • Dear Abby: Romantics should come back to earth Dear Abby: I have been single for a couple of years. I have always been levelheaded when it comes to romance, but I'm finding myself unable to control my feelings about the new man I'm seeing. "Brent" is smart, intelligent, sweet and loving. We have

    August 16, 2014

  • North Shore religion calendar Saturday, Aug. 16 Church Yard Sale, 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., Our Lady of Fatima Church, 50 Walsh Ave., Peabody. Church-sponsored yard sale features home furnishings, clothing, children's items, furniture and more. Portuguese food will also be available. All

    August 16, 2014

  • North Shore religion news in brief The Church of the Holy Name is seeking artists and crafters to participate in the Fall Arts and Craft Fair on Saturday, Sept. 20, from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. at the church, located at the corner of Monument Avenue and Thomas Road in Swampscott. A limited a

    August 16, 2014

  • This weekend's Best Bets Best Bets for Saturday, Aug. 16 and Sunday, Aug. 17

    Looking for something to do this weekend? Check out The Salem News' Best Bets.

    August 16, 2014 1 Photo

  • North Shore Gardener: Toad in your garden? That’s a good thing Q: There are several large toads -- some as big as a fist -- that live around the hosta on the shady side of my garden. They seem to especially like to be near the faucet, which sometimes leaks! Are they doing any harm? My small dog got one in his mo

    August 15, 2014

  • Dr. Kate's Parent Rap: Mission statement can help with co-parenting troubles More often than not, when I speak with parents today, they describe struggles with their children that originate in parenting conflicts. Parents often disagree when making daily decisions, and yet, they are steadfast in their beliefs that they share

    August 15, 2014

  • 0709_sn_out_tinticolor.jpg Salem native Hannah Tinti returns for Community Read The author of "The Good Thief" thinks her novel is a good choice for Salem's Community Read event next week. "It's something that appeals to adult readers and also younger readers," said Salem native Hannah Tinti. "It's sort of a crossover book. It w

    August 15, 2014 1 Photo

NDN Video
Comments Tracker