:Deep Sorrow In Ohio
:Dear Deep Sorrow: I agree that listening and being supportive is what you can do best for your friend. When the son raises the subject again with his mother, she should tell him that she loves him and will see that his wishes are carried out, even though losing him will be losing a part of herself.
When you see the mother again, ask if he has an advance directive for medical decisions in place. In it, a person can specify that only palliative care is preferred.
A group that offers guidance in drafting these important documents — and one to which I contribute — is Compassion and Choices. The toll-free number is 800-247-7421. If your friend does not have an advance directive, it’s important that he make one now.
Dear Abby: Our across-the-street neighbors feel they need to mow their lawn three (excessive) times a week. This includes using a weed-eater and two mowers — a push mower and a large riding mower. Quite often, the husband chooses to mow after 8 p.m. He doesn’t work and could do it during the morning hours if he wants it cooler.
The noise is loud and extremely disruptive and lasts about an hour because he goes over and over the same area. We work and would like to enjoy the few hours we have in the evening and relax. Any ideas?
:Tired Of The Noise In Montana
:Dear Tired Of The Noise: If you’re on speaking terms with this neighbor, you should ask him if he would please manicure his lawn at a different time because the noise is disruptive. If he is unwilling to cooperate, check with the city to find out if there are any noise ordinances in place. If there are, you can report the noise as a nuisance.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.