SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

January 30, 2013

Dear Abby: Man wants wife along for ride to take the reins and lead

(Continued)

We have been trying to get pregnant for years, and it hasn’t happened. I’m starting to believe it is a sign that I should move on. Should I follow my heart and be with Drew or stay with Richard despite my feelings? Please help.

Distraught in Texas

Dear Distraught: I’m willing to wager that if you devoted just a fraction of the energy you have spent on your extracurricular relationship to your husband, your marriage would be in better shape.

With the help of a marriage counselor, you might even be able to address those issues you feel have been ignored and re-establish your “connection.”

But for you to throw away your marriage for someone you haven’t met in person would be a serious mistake. Be glad that you haven’t gotten pregnant and dragged a child into this. It would have broken your husband’s heart, not only because you abandoned him but also because he would have been separated from the child he loved.

Dear Abby: A year ago, I gave my brother-in-law a framed print that had belonged to my late husband. Some time afterward, out of curiosity, I researched it and found that it is worth far more than I realized — several thousand dollars.

I haven’t mentioned this to my brother-in-law. I would never ask for the print back, but would it be OK to let him know the value and mention that if he ever decides not to keep it, I might like it returned? (I would sell it and put the money in my daughter’s college fund.)

Gave More Than I Thought

Dear Gave: Level with your brother-in-law about having researched the print and ask him to return it. When you do, tell him you need the money for your daughter’s college fund. Offer to exchange it for an item with sentimental value. Honesty is the best policy, and he may agree.

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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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