Yes, you’re wasting your time. If you want someone to share living expenses so you can enjoy a better lifestyle, find yourself a roommate.
Dear Abby: I have been married for 29 years, and I’m having concerns about my husband. I’m not sure what to make of the fact that he is becoming effeminate.
For many years, he has shaved his underarms, legs, etc., to the point that he is completely hairless. He recently lost some weight and is joining a gym. He wears women’s stretch tights and a girdle to work out, because he says it helps him sweat around his middle. He is also very concerned about exfoliating the bottom of his feet and putting lotion on his legs.
He says these things shouldn’t bother me, but they do. I don’t know what to make of it, and when I try to talk to him about my concerns, he blows me off. Do other men do this kind of stuff? I’ve only been with him, so I don’t know. Can you give me another perspective?
:A Little Worried In Wisconsin
Dear Worried: These days some men wax, shave, moisturize and exfoliate their bodies. Your husband may wear tights at the gym because he looks around and sees younger men with sleeker physiques and he’s self-conscious about his own. If he’s not getting strange looks from others working out there, his attire may not be that unusual.
It’s important that couples, particularly those who have been married as long as you two have, be able to talk to each other. Because some of this is a recent change in your husband’s behavior, you deserve an explanation.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.