SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

September 7, 2013

Dear Abby: Parents disdain marriage after failure of their own

:Dear Abby: I’m 24 and a college graduate. My boyfriend, “Jordan,” and I have been together for a year and we would like to get married. However, my parents are against the idea. They love Jordan, but they think marriage is stupid because, in 2013, “WHO is getting married?”

I think this is totally ridiculous, but I don’t know what to do. I want to be married and I would love my parents’ approval, but it’s hard when they call me stupid for wanting to take that step just because their marriage didn’t work out.

I love Jordan and I love my parents. Should I have to choose between the two?

:Totally Torn

:Dear Totally Torn: You do not have to choose between your parents and being married. At 24, you are an adult and mature enough to make your own decision about the importance of the institution.

As to the question of “who is getting married” these days, one answer is people with college degrees are marrying at a greater rate than those with only a high school education — and their unions are more lasting. I’m sorry your parents’ marriage didn’t work out, but you would be foolish to let their cynical opinion of this kind of commitment taint your perspective. I hope you and Jordan enjoy many happy and fulfilling years together.

:

Dear Abby: What are your thoughts about co-workers dating? I have a crush on one of my co-workers, and I believe it is reciprocated. We’re unsure about an office romance because, while it isn’t against the rules for people to date within the building, there are concerns about sexual harassment or inappropriate behavior on the premises. (Some of our co-workers have dated with no problems.)

Would it be wrong to attempt to further the relationship, as long as it remains appropriate within the office, or should I forget it and date someone outside of work?

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