SalemNews.com, Salem, MA

Lifestyle

September 17, 2013

Dear Abby: Volatile younger sister must reach out for help on her own

:Dear Abby: My younger sister, “Tanya,” is 22 and a single mother. Her son is 2. She’s pregnant again, and this time her baby will be a girl. My sister is very dramatic and emotional. She gets angry easily and has a short fuse. She’s great with her son, except he picks up on her drama and is somewhat dramatic himself. My worry is that girls are more likely to imitate that behavior, and I’m concerned my niece will be just like her mother. Although Tanya has a good heart, her emotional issues have caused her to have horrible relationships with men, as our mother did. When I suggested to my sister that she talk to someone about her anger, she flipped out on me. We were both sexually abused as children. I have dealt with those issues, and she has not. Was I rude to suggest she see someone about her emotional problems?

:Just Trying to Help

:Dear Trying To Help: Suggesting that Tanya discuss this with a professional wasn’t rude; it was a loving thing to do. Your sister reacted defensively because she isn’t ready to admit she needs help. What you must do is hope that one day she will be receptive, but also accept that it may never happen. Not everyone is strong enough to face the fact that they need help or willing to reach out for it.

Dear Abby: How does a person quit being a quitter? At 46, I have realized that this is what I am. I have quit everything — church, jobs, school. If I don’t like a friend, I just drop the person. The same goes for books, exercise — everything! How do you stop the lifelong habit of quitting?

:Quitter in Charleston

:Dear Charleston: I hate to see you give yourself a pejorative label. It’s time to have yourself evaluated because it is possible you suffer from attention deficit disorder — and if you do, there is help for it. If that’s not the case, then start small, give yourself a goal you CAN accomplish and don’t stop until you have reached it. It doesn’t have to be anything complicated, but see it through. Then give yourself another, more difficult assignment and finish it.

Text Only | Photo Reprints
Lifestyle
  • Orchid North Shore Gardener: It’s the summer without hydrangeas August "Fairest of the months! Ripe summer's queen, the hey-day of the year, with robes that gleam with sunny sheen Sweet August doth appear." -- R. Combe Miller Q: Can you tell me why my numerous "Endless Summer" hydrangea plants are not blooming th

    August 1, 2014 1 Photo

  • Dr. Kate: 8 strategies to help your child overcome a fear of bullies Despite the massive anti-bullying campaigns that dominate our current culture, many students continue to feel bullied. The current anti-bullying campaign focuses on decreasing bullying by policing the bullies, but what about empowering the victims? B

    August 1, 2014

  • booknotes0801 Stroll through a story at Danvers library Reading can be good for the body as well as the mind. That's especially true for visitors of the new StoryWalk at Peabody Institute Library of Danvers. "StoryWalk is combining physical activity with reading," said Karen Veilleux, a children's librar

    August 1, 2014 1 Photo

  • frenkel Quick pick: Bring stories to life Bring stories to life Explore and experience the challenges and satisfactions of combining text with images in a four-session illustration workshop, led by award-winning published illustrator Yetti Frenkel at the Abbot Public Library, 235 Pleasant St

    August 1, 2014 1 Photo

  • TV Outlander [Duplicate] 'Outlander' brings novels to life vibrantly NEW YORK -- There's an odd believability you find inside "Outlander" that somehow makes it feel true-to-life. Never mind that it's a rip-roaring fantasy. Claire, a lovely British Army nurse on a second honeymoon in Scotland, is mysteriously swept fr

    August 1, 2014 4 Photos

  • Dear Abby: Diabetic friend suffers close call miles away from hospital Dear Abby: My husband and I have a lake house and invited a couple (close friends) to join us for a few days. The husband has cancer and has been taking chemo. We wanted them both to rest, as the wife is his only caregiver. We all thought this would

    August 1, 2014

  • Friday's Best Bets Best Bets for Friday, Aug. 1

    Looking for something to do today? Here are The Salem News' Best Bets:

    August 1, 2014 1 Photo

  • Thursday's Best Bets Best Bets for Thursday, July 31

    Looking for something to do today? Here are The Salem News' Best Bets:

    July 31, 2014 1 Photo

  • homecoming1 Festivals in Salem and Beverly celebrate cities' heritage

    Salem Heritage Days and Beverly Homecoming, both of which start this weekend, are roughly the same age. "This is the 49th year," said Bruce Doig, director of parks and recreation in Beverly. "The most recent form of homecoming started in 1966 as a wa

    July 31, 2014 6 Photos

  • 140723_SN_DLE_MINER5 For artist Nathan Miner, it’s not what you see, but how Visitors can see five paintings by Nathan Miner, and watch one being created, at Montserrat College of Art this summer. That's because the gallery where the artist's works are hanging includes a studio where he will be working until Aug. 14, in a co

    July 31, 2014 5 Photos

NDN Video
Comments Tracker